Just A Question Really.

I HAVE BEEN ASKING MYSELF THIS FOR REALLY QUITE SOME TIME NOW. I MEAN I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHY I HAVEN'T DONE THIS YET. IT'S NOT LIKE I WOULD BE MISSED OR SOMETHING. I FEEL VERY ALONE & ABANDONED & UNWANTED & PUSHED AWAY & IGNORED & MORE. YES I AM EXTREMELY SEVERELY DEPRESSED & DAMAGED. I HAVE SUICIDAL THOUGHTS DAILY. I PRAYED & PRAYED SO VERY HARD TO LEAVE THE HOUSE I'M AT & ALL & GOT NOTHING. IT WILL BE A YEAR NEXT MONTH THAT I HAVE BEEN HERE WHERE I AM. I AM VERY HEARTBROKEN & DEVASTATED & MORE BY IT. BY THE WAY DO NOT TWIST MY WORDS OR PUT WORDS IN MY MOUTH I AM NOT SAYING I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF. SO DON'T GET IT TWISTED. ANYWAY, I JUST FEEL HOW I FEEL & MY FEELINGS ARE VERY VALID. I WILL NEVER EVER EVER EVER FORGIVE THOSE WHO ALLOWED THIS TO HAPPEN ME BEING WHERE I AM. BECAUSE IT'S UNFORGIVABLE. I'M SORRY NOT SORRY. MY APOLOGIES FOR THE RANT & ALL BUT IT'S HOW I FEEL & I'M JUST TIRED OF FIGHTING & EXPECTED TO CONTINUE TO PUT UP WITH ALL THAT I'M GOING THROUGH IT'S NOT RIGHT. IT'S ALL I HAVE BEEN DOING MY WHOLE LIFE IS STRUGGLE & FIGHT & MORE. I HAVE ALWAYS FOUGHT MY OWN BATTLES BY MYSELF & HAVE DONE SO MUCH ON MY OWN & BY MYSELF. IT'S TRULY HEARTBREAKING💔 & VERY SAD. NO ONE SHOULD EVER EVER EVER SUFFER THE WAY I HAVE & I WOULD NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER WISH IT ON MY WORST ENEMY OR ANYONE AT THAT. AGAIN JUST MY FEELINGS & THOUGHTS. GOD BLESS & PEACE BE WITH YOU ALL. 🙏🏾🙏🏾👼🏾👼🏾💕💕💕🫂🫂✝️☮️🕯🕯🕯🕊🕊🕊🗽🍀❤